Not that it will change anyone's mind, but given that I'm more than half way through DNF on the PC, here are my thoughts:
- Graphics on the PC are decent when maxed out on good hardware.
- Load-times are unbearably long. 25-45seconds on a Dual-core 3.0Ghz machine (SATA drives, no SSD here) and an Radeon HD 6950.
- Did I mention load-times?
- Nudity is abundant and enjoyably breasty (I sincerely doubt MOST of the people looking down their nose while playing this game don't actually enjoy this aspect).
- Level design is boring and feels very "last gen shooter". Not much detail (although the Vegas back drop during the first 1/4 of the game is decent) and movement through a level is primarily linear.
- Guns are boring and feel VERY uninspired. There is nothing "fun" about the weapons. There isn't a single gun I enjoy shooting. I'm a gun connoisseur when it comes to FPS; for example, the Turok remake was an OK game (annoying terrible at parts) but the weapon design and sound work was fantastic.
- Enemies are not fun to fight or kill. Some of the bosses are interesting, but the enemies you fight the other 97% of the time are either overly aggressive and beat you down, making you frantic to take them out at the expense of "having fun" with them (e.g. freeze ray, shrink ray, etc... you are just panic'ed to kill them) or they have some annoying stupid AI routines (like flashing in/out of position as their health gets low) that does nothing for the gameplay and just artificially extends the boring-ass battle.
- The game isn't funny -- it's not that they don't try, it's just a bunch of humor that isn't enjoyable anymore. Sort of like popping Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure in and not laughing once and trying to remember why you were rolling on the floor laughing when that movie came out. Or popping in Wayne's World and trying to remember why you EVER though Dana Carvey talking strange and both of them stay "SCHWING!" ad nauseum was enjoyable.
- Monster-truck/mini-car-driving scenes are the most enjoyable so far.
- Difficulty is not balanced well at all. With 3 or more pig-gorillas on screen you can get your ass handed to you very quickly on Easy and on Hard you can take down a boss just as quickly. I don't understand what the difficulty settings do exactly. Regardless, Easy doesn't feel "Easy" and Hard doesn't always feel "Hard".
- For as much time/money/marketing Broussard put behind the "interactivity" of the world -- it feels really flat. There are a few simulated things (like pin-ball machines and poker machines) that are fully implemented and a total waste of effort IMO, at the expensive of plenty of other things being non-inter-actable. This is a perfect example of "depth" not "breadth" design in all the wrong places.
- The game is written/designed around the idea that you care at all about the fan-fare that is Duke. I don't and I imagine most people playing this game honestly don't care at all about the Duke character -- given that, a lot of the enjoyability of being in this all-duke world, being this over-the-top-character that is super-flat... just means nothing. So what little "umph" being Duke was going to breath into this just isn't there at all. As a comparison, it was intoxicating to be Shepard in Mass Effect 2 with all the characters in the world reacting to seeing you for the first time after what happened (avoiding a spoiler here) -- in Duke, I am just not entertained by all the things Duke in this world. IN FAIRNESS, I might have cared in 2004, so maybe all this stuff was applicable and funny at some point.
You can't slap a single tag on this game like "Offensive" or "Unfunny" or "Uninspired" and point at that single thing as it's failing... it's all of them to some degree.
The game is not a glaring flop, it's just mostly boring to play (it feels like a chore to me), has a few high-light moments (bewbs) and is totally forgettable.
For $5 rental? Sure pick it up and play it. For $39-49-59? No freaking way. I can literally think of 100 better games to put your money on depending on your preferences.
- Graphics on the PC are decent when maxed out on good hardware.
- Load-times are unbearably long. 25-45seconds on a Dual-core 3.0Ghz machine (SATA drives, no SSD here) and an Radeon HD 6950.
- Did I mention load-times?
- Nudity is abundant and enjoyably breasty (I sincerely doubt MOST of the people looking down their nose while playing this game don't actually enjoy this aspect).
- Level design is boring and feels very "last gen shooter". Not much detail (although the Vegas back drop during the first 1/4 of the game is decent) and movement through a level is primarily linear.
- Guns are boring and feel VERY uninspired. There is nothing "fun" about the weapons. There isn't a single gun I enjoy shooting. I'm a gun connoisseur when it comes to FPS; for example, the Turok remake was an OK game (annoying terrible at parts) but the weapon design and sound work was fantastic.
- Enemies are not fun to fight or kill. Some of the bosses are interesting, but the enemies you fight the other 97% of the time are either overly aggressive and beat you down, making you frantic to take them out at the expense of "having fun" with them (e.g. freeze ray, shrink ray, etc... you are just panic'ed to kill them) or they have some annoying stupid AI routines (like flashing in/out of position as their health gets low) that does nothing for the gameplay and just artificially extends the boring-ass battle.
- The game isn't funny -- it's not that they don't try, it's just a bunch of humor that isn't enjoyable anymore. Sort of like popping Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure in and not laughing once and trying to remember why you were rolling on the floor laughing when that movie came out. Or popping in Wayne's World and trying to remember why you EVER though Dana Carvey talking strange and both of them stay "SCHWING!" ad nauseum was enjoyable.
- Monster-truck/mini-car-driving scenes are the most enjoyable so far.
- Difficulty is not balanced well at all. With 3 or more pig-gorillas on screen you can get your ass handed to you very quickly on Easy and on Hard you can take down a boss just as quickly. I don't understand what the difficulty settings do exactly. Regardless, Easy doesn't feel "Easy" and Hard doesn't always feel "Hard".
- For as much time/money/marketing Broussard put behind the "interactivity" of the world -- it feels really flat. There are a few simulated things (like pin-ball machines and poker machines) that are fully implemented and a total waste of effort IMO, at the expensive of plenty of other things being non-inter-actable. This is a perfect example of "depth" not "breadth" design in all the wrong places.
- The game is written/designed around the idea that you care at all about the fan-fare that is Duke. I don't and I imagine most people playing this game honestly don't care at all about the Duke character -- given that, a lot of the enjoyability of being in this all-duke world, being this over-the-top-character that is super-flat... just means nothing. So what little "umph" being Duke was going to breath into this just isn't there at all. As a comparison, it was intoxicating to be Shepard in Mass Effect 2 with all the characters in the world reacting to seeing you for the first time after what happened (avoiding a spoiler here) -- in Duke, I am just not entertained by all the things Duke in this world. IN FAIRNESS, I might have cared in 2004, so maybe all this stuff was applicable and funny at some point.
You can't slap a single tag on this game like "Offensive" or "Unfunny" or "Uninspired" and point at that single thing as it's failing... it's all of them to some degree.
The game is not a glaring flop, it's just mostly boring to play (it feels like a chore to me), has a few high-light moments (bewbs) and is totally forgettable.
For $5 rental? Sure pick it up and play it. For $39-49-59? No freaking way. I can literally think of 100 better games to put your money on depending on your preferences.